April Already

Semesters gone by really fast, soon I'll be done with finals and just a little time until I get to go to Vienna. Which in case you haven't noticed I'm really excited for. Hopefully before hand though I'll be able to head out to Colorado to visit my sister, brother-in-law and nephew. Ok really I'm going to visit my nephew his parents will just be there....well sort of it'll be nice to see them too. I've started to notice lately how completely uninteresting watching sports is as I'm writing this watching a volleyball game. Sean interrupts here: Get used to it. whatever. I'm totally used to it I will just never find it interesting....
Things of note at the moment. Not to much I'm just bored and trying to take up time. Well someone did get me sick this week so I only left my apartment once from the time I left church early on Sunday until Wednesday morning and that was to purchase juice meds and tissues. But for all of those that keep asking about that red-head that is in all those pictures he was nice and brought me soup. But that did not miraculously cure me as he so thinks. (Sean-it did) Yeah in high school I loved missing school it was more or less amazing, missing classes now basically sucks, you feel pretty behind pretty quickly-or at least I did.
Other things of note would be stealing so I'll let someone else talk about them. Or they are still underwraps.

Boredom
T.V. mixes with
bickering and exclamations
the light gives the room
an unkempt feel
sometimes the people
make it tense
akward comments
constant questions
and an overall ability
to just be

annoying.

Family Confessions

Series of short stories(meant to be illustrated)

Mother May I Tell You?
Mother may I tell you
that when I was four I left my shoes at the edge of the park
and went barefoot all afternoon
Mother may I tell you
that when I was five I swore at the bugs
because you couldn’t hear me
Mother may I tell you
that when I was seven I dropped (not spilled) my tomato soup
on that sweater you made me wear
Mother may I tell you
that when I was eleven I had my first kiss
that day you told me there wasn’t a stork
Mother may I tell you
that when I was fourteen I muttered under my breath
I hate you because you made me stay home
Mother may I tell you
that when I was sixteen I had my first and last puff of a cigarette
you were right, I wanted to die
Mother may I tell you
that summer I spent at the beach I wore a bikini
and low cut dresses and I knew you’d be upset
Mother may I tell you
my first year at university I got a tattoo of a star
and almost screamed because you touched it
Mother may I tell you
that when I was twenty I told people I was adopted
when they said I looked like you
Mother may I tell you
that when I was twenty-two and you took me back in
I complained about you to all my friends
Mother now that I told you
do you love me still?
Daughter may I tell you
that I knew
and I will always love you.

The Difference
My daddy held me in his arms the day I was born
and promised to love me forever
My daddy taught me how to tie my shoes
and how to try again
My daddy stood at the end of the driveway
watching me ride away on my bike
My daddy stayed up with me all night
that time I was sick
My daddy taught me my ABC’s
and took me to the playground
My daddy helped me build snowmen
and gave me hot cocoa
My daddy hugged me
and told me I was a light in the night
My dad hugged me
and told me everything would be alright
My dad helped me build courage
And gave me strength
My dad taught me to be independent
and took me to college
My dad stayed up all night the first time
I didn’t come home
My dad stood at security
watching me go away to distant lands
My dad taught me how to do my taxes
and how to try again
My dad gave me away the day another man
promised to love me forever
The difference is time
Even though I won’t always be little
I’ll always be his girl

I want to know you
This is for all the times I didn’t visit
This is for all the times I felt ashamed
This is for all the pictures I didn’t take
This is for all the stories I didn’t hear
This is for all the times I didn’t call
This is for all the sarcastic comments
This is for all things I didn’t say
This is for all the hugs I didn’t give
This is for all the games I didn’t play
This is for all the times I didn’t try
This is for all the people I saw instead
This is for all the things I didn’t understand
This is for all the times I didn’t smile
This is for not saying goodbye
I’m sorry.
The thing about mortals is
we are dumb enough to forget
that this life ends.


Why I am Glad I don’t have a brother
I’m glad I don’t have a brother
No one pulls my hair
No one takes my stuff
No one eats my cookies
No one steals my books
No one finds my hidden secrets
No one teases my friends
No one sits on me
No one hits me
No one tells my stories
No one takes my jokes
No one laughs at my ideas
No one upstages me!
Some people like brothers for protection
Now this I just don’t get
Because for your protection you get teased and pulled and punched
I get it for just being me!
Yes I’m glad I don’t have a brother
Because dear sister
I’d rather have you!

Sister did you know?
Sister did you know
that I always wanted to be you?
You had the coolest friends
and the coolest clothes.
I actually loved
to get you your drinks
to cook your dinner
to talk to you
when you told me to change
when you gave me advice
no matter how much I complained.
Sister did you see
that I tried to be like you?
I tried on all your styles
I attempted all your mannerisms
I worked on not being so little
I took all of your advice
even though you weren’t supposed to see
I know you did.
Sister did you know
I always believed in you?
Even when you went astray
and told me to go away
even when you changed
and grew from girl to woman
confused as everyone is
I always thought you should be famous
that you could do anything.
I still think you can.
And even though you’ve told me to never be you,
sister do you know
that I still want to be like you?
You have the most caring heart
you have the sweetest smile
you have the most determined nature
you are the most courageous person
you never let anyone get you down.
Sister do you see
that because of you
I try
to smile more
to believe more
to care more
to try more
to never give up.
Sister do you know
that you have always been
beautiful?

Only at BYU....

If a teacher swears in class the whole class gasps but then no one is surprised at the disscusion of
Jesus Christ

Can you find posters advertising womens seminars one of which is Flirting made Easy.


When you look for housing you first have to specify for married or single housing


There seems to be a lack of guys from the ages of 19-21(19 year olds are all leaving, 21 year olds just got back, 20 year olds more or less don't exist)

About half the graduating class each year is married

You can find many many many people in the freshman class that are engaged

People can date for ten days and then get engaged

You know everyone in your area because they are in your ward and when you ask people what the ward is like when you look for a new apt.

Basically only freshman live on campus.

18-19 year olds are nick-named "Pre-mi's" and guys over 21 are RM's

when they surran wrap signs and statues during rival week

you hope you don't have a roommate from Utah.

I'm sure a lot of other things too I'm just too lazy to think of them

Anyone else excited for valentine's day?

I like you

I like you
Not because you play the piano
But because you only like to play for me
Not because you cook for me
But because you think about what I want
Not because you take me out
But because you want to
Not because you tell me I’m beautiful
But because you mean it
Not because you kiss my hand
But because my heart stops when you do
Not because of the color of your eyes
But the way you look into mine
Not because of what you do
But because you’re doing something
Not because you like me
But because you are you.

She drew on her Shoes

A favorite pair of shoes
is an important thing
often they're old
often they're comfortable
sometimes crazy people love
new, tight, pristine shoes.

Her shoes were once white
now somewhere between
off-white and brown
with blue and black stars
and hearts scattered
her name on the sole

She has a pair of heels
bright red and tweed wedges
she likes to wear them
they make her feel beautiful
even if the squeeze her toes
but they're sunday shoes.

She likes the shoes
that are covered in
dirt and ink the ones
that can get wet.
A favorite pair of shoes
is an important thing.


Animals of Light

Startled I thought
I heard something
scurry across the trail
of water on the ground
looking down I thought
I saw a mouse, but
all there was, was
light gliding over the water
like a bird in flight

Snow-fall

Leaning over the back
of my couch
to look out the window at
falling snow
reflecting at the beauty of each
small white flake
Smiling as I very slowly
slip and Wam
Note to self face plants on
a couch hurt.

New

Making the boots fit

Each morning she pulls
herself out of bed
with a shiver and a sigh
simply drops her head
to face today and all the
tomorrows full of dread.
Age is glorious it's
beautiful never vain
and no mater how much
we hate it, it advances again
each day brings wisdom and doubt
and she wakes a bit more insane.
Wisdom and glory come of a
devestating cost,
it seems as our minds
expand our limbs become lost
beneath pillows we lose ourselves
like trying to find a window under frost.
And a pair of well worn leather
boots lie in the corner
will they work or not, as she pulls
and tugs and hopes for the former
with the zipper pulled 3/4ths up
because they just won't fit.

Cow goes Moo

shuffling along the ice
in my too-small
heart covered rain-boots
along with the other
thousands shuffling along
being pushed with the flow
someone breaks away
and pushes into me
ow!
then I proceed shuffling
as to not be trampled
as I move
I become angry
forced to walk in
a line-a formation
I stop and yell
at the sky
MOOO
and then shuffle on
as I reflect
I think-at least
there aren't any whips

What will you be remembered as?

The one who smiles when everyone frowns or the one that looks down when everyone else is looking up? Ok so my English teachers grandmother died recently(she was really cool, she helped her dad plant the palm trees in front of the Hawaii temple) and this gave her the brilliant idea that we should write our own obituaries, she says this isn't morbid since they celebrate life and not death, but yeah people don't mind obituaries because they're dead and can't hear people talking about them. Plus its a little akward to write about yourself in third person and in past tense as if you were dead. Well in case you're interested heres mine, the quote is from The Prince.

“Everyone can see what you appear to be, whereas few have direct experience of what you really are…” (Machiavelli) A way to describe Anne would be hidden, so many things she didn’t tell people or let it show. She was an avid reader with a few hundred books crammed in to a lonely bookcase, stacked tight and two rows deep; she was constantly reading a book and putting off “important” things. Anne loved to write, she had notebooks full of ideas and beginnings somehow she never found the time to finish-putting it off for when things settle down, for when she had time. Although Anne hid a lot of who she was, not letting people in before they were tested, she tried to never be fake. She listened to the music and watched the movies that made her happy, wore the clothes that she liked. She never did anything because it was the cool thing to do, but then again she didn’t shun something that was. Anne never wanted to be fooled; she thought things out and made her own opinion about things regardless of who her friends were. She was born and grew up in a time of change; she lived in a place that encouraged thought and individualism. Besides sparking her love of all things German her birth in Berlin during the fall of the wall later made her think of how she never wanted to be imprisoned. Growing up near the nation’s capital Anne became unafraid to make her ideas her own no matter how much they contradicted the world’s views, hearing about protests and demonstrations not only from the news, but from her friends and some she saw with her own eyes. This instilled a need in her to never believe in something you don’t, it made it easier to be one of the only members of the LDS church at her school. Anne loved to be a good friend, with a rather nurturing nature-if one of her friends was sick she would go and care for them even if she might be getting sick then too, she was always the one that her friends went to when they had troubles seeing as she could just listen and didn’t give advice when she didn’t have any. Anne knew the value of the words I don’t know, one of her professors once told her class to know what you know and know what you don’t know, for her there was no shame in not knowing something, it would be worse to pretend you did. Anne loved to learn and learned anything she could from anyone who cared to teach her. She would listen to anyone’s opinion with patience and real consideration, but it took a lot to change her mind about something. She often described herself as a five-year-old saying that when an idea took hold of her she stubbornly wouldn’t let go until it had come to pass or she decided she didn’t want it anymore. Anne loved to travel and would go anywhere she could, she wanted to see everywhere and learn about a lot of different cultures-she feared living in a bubble being too proud to find out what was going on beyond her own little sphere. Anne actually liked to pop other people’s bubble never afraid to be different. She was that girl you saw dancing around in the mall just because the song was a good one, or the girl on the side of the road kicking up the leaves. It was hard to really get to know Anne because she was rather reserved, but anyone could see that she loved to live.

I don't know how I'm remembered but I hope it will be nice, plus that I live at least fifty more years, I'd be nearly seventy then amazing what half a century could do for a person. In that time I want to see everything, learn so much more read so much more write so much more, and I want to be a mom-so at least fifty years would be nice, but then again you never know somethings you can't plan for so we shouldn't put things off. Did I mention because of this death I got to miss 3 classes? Yeah 2 of her's and then her husband's. Today take five minutes to do nothing it will likely turn into ten but sometimes its simply wonderous to squander time friviously.

New Semester, New Year, Same Anne

Because I would like to have a post that actually goes up the day I start writing it and not 2-3 weeks later. Can I just say that formating anything on this is really annoying? It never listens to be I always have to go back and fix it like 5 times before it does what I want it to. Anyone know why? Ok so this semester I have German 102-I'm really looking forward to when I have a German class that I actually learn something in again, which I am sad to report won't be untill next summer, and since I may come back with a pretty good hold on the language learning may be behind again....blarg. I'm also in the second half of book of mormon Civilizations 2, First Year Writing and Old Testament(I was in ethnic chinese dance but i decided to put that off until I can get someone to take it with me) and second block I will have a Vienna prep-class. I'm still working nights at the Wilk(BYU's student center) and I actually really like it I'm a co-supervior(a misnomer its actually an assistant-supervisor) Its funny when our Full-time supervisor asks me questions about how our crew is doing I never know anything, my supervior told Dave when he mentioned my lack of knowlege that he has a problem communicating with women and doesn't tell me anything-he really doesn't tell me anything. As for the New Year, I'm spending my summer in Vienna Austria and won't be home for an entire year, but even though I'll be broke and won't be able to see my family and friends for a while it'll really be worth it. I've made some good friends out here in Utah and plan on spending tons of time with them. Well I'm off to read Machiavelli's the Prince so I can start a paper-oh the joys of college.